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Edit paragraph sentences for theme

Read the following paragraph, and identify the overall impression it conveys. Then rewrite the paragraph to eliminate any details that undercut or fail to contribute to the overall impression. You may replace those details with more appropriate ones.

It was definitely Christmas. The smell of cinnamon and pine was thick in our house. Dad's footsteps could be heard on the roof as he strung up white lights around the edge of the roof. Christmas carols floated from the den where Mom was wrapping presents. The phone kept ringing and I yelled for my sister to answer it. The crisp, cold night seemed to whisper that Santa was on his way. Dad came inside and said that he needed an extension cord. Our Christmas tree was fat with homemade ornaments and tinsel resting on its soft needles.

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It was definitely Christmas. The smell of cinnamon and pine was thick in our house. Dad's footsteps could be heard on the roof as he strung up white lights around the edge of the roof. Christmas carols floated from the den where Mom was wrapping presents. The phone kept ringing and I yelled for my sister to answer it. The crisp, cold night seemed to whisper that Santa was on his way. Dad came inside and said that he needed an extension cord. Our Christmas tree was fat with ...

Solution Summary

Editing paragraph sentences to better reflect the overall theme of the piece. The details that undercut or fail to contribute to the overall impressions are given.

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