Parenting Styles

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In addressing the topic of parenting, an interesting quote is put forth by Edith Belle Lowry, False Modesty (1912)--"For years we have given scientific attention to the care and rearing of plants and animals, but we have allowed babies to be raised chiefly by tradition."

MYTHS ABOUT PARENTING

- The birth of a child will save a marriage.
- As a possession or extension of the parent, the child will think, feel, and behave like the parents did in their childhood.
- Children will take care of parents in old age.
- Parents can expect respect and get obedience from their children.
- Having a child means that the parents will always have someone who loves them and is their best friend.
- Having a child gives the parents a "second chance" to achieve what they should have achieved.
- If parents learn the right techniques, they can mold their children into what they want.
- It's the parent's fault when children fail.
- Mothers are naturally better parents than fathers.
- Parenting is an instinct and requires no training.

WHERE DO THESE MYTHS ORGINATE AND WHY?

Mostly, the needs and expectations of parents have stimulated these myths about parenting (Okun & Rappaport, 1980). For many adults, the parental role is well planned and coordinated with other roles in life and developed with the individuals' economic situation in mind.For others, the discovery that they are about to become parents is a startling surprise.

In either event, the prospective parents may have mixed emotions and romantic illusions about having a child which result in varying parenting methods and styles of parenting.

WHY DO PARENTS RELY ON THEIR NEEDS AND EXPECTATIONS WHEN PARENTING?

There is little formal education for the task of parenting even though parenting consists of a number of interpersonal skills and emotional demands.

Therefore, most adults learn most of their parenting practices from their parents-some of these practices they accept and some they ...