Emotional Intelligence

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The email might start something to the effect...

Dear Mentor (you would use the person's name):

I have researched Emotional Intelligence (EI). I have decided to evaluate my current manager on each of the five comments of emotional intelligences as posited by Daniel Goleman (1998).

1. Self-Awareness: Does she have the ability to recognize and understand personal moods and emotions? Was she or he self-confidence, realistic self-assessment, and a self-deprecating sense of humor? If you can answer yes to these, then you might conclude that she demonstrates high levels of self-awareness, one component of EI.

2. Self-Regulation: Does she have the ability to control or redirect disruptive impulses and moods and the propensity to suspend judgment and to think before acting? Did it include trustworthiness and integrity, comfort with ambiguity, self-control, and openness to change? If so, you could conclude that she or he had the ability to be self-regulating, an important component of EI.

3. Motivation: Does this person have a passion to work for reasons that go beyond money and status? Did she or he have a tendency to pursue goals with energy and persistence? Did this include a strong drive to achieve, optimism even in the face of failure, and organizational commitment? If so, you could conclude that she scored high on the motivation component of EI.

4. Empathy: Does she have the ability to understand the EMOTIONAL makeup of other people? Give an example. Does she demonstrate the expertise in building and retaining talent, cross-cultural sensitivity, and service to clients and customers? If so, explain.

5. Social Skills: Does she demonstrate proficiency in managing relationships and building networks and an ability to find common ground and build rapport? Or, is she short with people, and non-inviting? Does it include effectiveness in leading change, persuasiveness, and expertise in building and leading teams? (Goleman, D. (1998) Working with emotional intelligence, New York: Bantam).

2. Evaluate your current or former manager on each of the five components of emotional intelligence.

ILLUSTRATIVE EXAMPLE:

Overall, my manager seems to demonstrate high levels of emotional intelligence according to Goleman's definition. For example, she demonstrates self-awareness through using emotional language, such as "I feel tired" "I felt frustrated when... and so on. She is also very self-confidence as evidenced through initiating different projects without hesitation (e.g., "I know we can get this done on time") and she can always seem to laugh at her mistakes. For example, I recall her saying while laughing one day: "I sure put my foot in mouth yesterday, didn't I?" She is indeed very self-aware according to Goleman's category of the self-awareness component of EI.

My manager also seemed to be self-regulating. For example, although she would verbalize her anger at certain situations (e.g. "I made a mistake. I am angry"), she was also able to control or redirect her angry impulses (e.g., "she would work on another project until she cooled down", or "leave the room until she worked out her feelings"). She took her work seriously and often verbalized her passion for work ("e.g. "I know we will succeed. I am so excited about this project"), which went beyond money and status (e.g., "I know we can make a difference by doing our best").

My manager has a way of looking at the good (e.g., optimistic - "we didn't meet the budget this week, but I know we can still accomplish what we set out to do") and encouraging others to do their best as well (e.g. "I have faith in your ability to get this done on time").

She also had the ability to empathize with other peoples feeling (e.g. "I can tell that you are upset") and embraced diversity (culture, ethnicity, religious, etc.). My manager also has the ability to communicate and establish rapport and trust in relationships (e.g. "Tell me about where you are with that"). She had excellent leadership skills that encouraged the team approach (e.g. "if we work together, we can meet the deadline"), which persuaded team members to take ownership of the change process, and then they worked toward a common goal.

Now, evaluate your own manager or past manager. You can use the information in the article at the end of this response which clearly described the types of behavior to consider in this analysis.

2. How can you apply the principles of emotional intelligence to your current situation?

Presently, "you're on your way to motivating your team from a group perspective, but you're still having trouble connecting with your team as individuals. Your mentor reminds you of the concept of emotional intelligence and how it can enhance your leadership capabilities."

This is asking you to evaluate your own situation in terms of applying the five components of emotional intelligence to your current situation. Perhaps you are having some difficulty containing your emotional impulses for example. Or, you might need improvement in empathizing with other people's feelings or a weakness in establishing rapport and trust in relationship with your co-workers. Continue going through the five components and decide where you have strengths, and perhaps where you might want to take the opportunity to address your weaknesses through taking a work-shop, for example, on how to build your emotional ...