Correcting an Email and Negativity
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Can someone please read the below e-mail and make any suggestions/comments on how not to sound like I am annoyed? I am the one writining this e-mail and I need it re-written to sound better. I am frustrated and I don't want to come across that way. I don't feel this is my responsibility. It should be the responsibility of the Bride and Groom.
Melissa,
I spoke to David of the Company (tele# 000.000.0000) he said the contract is there to protect his company and the customer.
In addition, I followed up with Miguel on a couple of the items I previously mentioned to you and this is his response:
 If the limo is late for any reason you will not be charged anything for the service
 When the contract refers to the client being negligent, they basically mean that if the client is in a fight in the limo and breaks a glass or damages something the client will be help liable to pay for the damages. If you bring food in the limo (which the company does not allow) and the food spills in the limo you will be responsible for the cleaning bill.
I am not sure what else you want me to do. If you still do not feel comfortable signing this contract I strongly recommend you contacting the limo company. This is a legal contract and I don't feel comfortable giving you the go ahead to sign something you don't feel comfortable with. Did you and Mike read the contract together? Other limo companies will have a contract for you to review and sign.
Betty and Gina did you guys read the contract? Do you have any concerns with the contract?
Thanks.
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Solution Summary
An example of how an email can be changed from a negative message to a more professional message. The email addresses a contract.
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I have made some changes to this document. It sounds more businesslike and less irritated. I am attaching a copy along with the copy here so you can accept the changes (review/track changes/accept changes) and then make any other changes you think it needs.
Melissa,
I spoke to David of the Company (tele# 000.000.0000). he said indicated the contract is written to protect the customer and his company. the contract is there to protect his company and the customer.
In addition, I also followed up with Miguel on a couple of ...
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